Unexpected guests

This happened back on 19th September, but it bears re-telling. I was lying in my bed on a Sunday night trying to drop off. Kept hearing a scratching sound, so of course tried to ignore it. When it became clear that something was making a noise, I put on a lamp & got up to investigate. Transpired said scratching was coming from the cupboard where the central heating boiler lives. Assuming it was a mouse, I opened the door expecting Stuart Little to bounce out. Nothing. Went and turned on the main light, and turned back to see something hanging on the back of the door. Can you tell what it is yet? It was a wee black blob hanging down, a bat no less. I just stood and looked at it, thinking 'What the F**k am I going to do?' Went and checked the internet and turns out the wee c**ts carry rabies, best wear gloves & long sleeves if you're gonna get up close & personal. Dressed for the occasion, I returned to my guest. Wee shite had moved. Hunted around and turns out he's moved up on top of the roller blind. Cunning, but not cunning enough. Inter-High-Web also suggested using a cardboard box for entrapment. So dressed to kill and armed to the teeth with a shoe box I aproached my prey. Tugging gently on the cord of the blind, young Nosferatu edged forward bit by bit. Eventually he was hanging by one mangy claw finger, as I held the box below expectantly. Just at the last moment the little shit swooped down and started flying round the room. Pretty fancy moves for a little dude, and it was pretty amazing to be so close to a creature you usually don't get a swatch at. However, the Johnny Morris moment soon passed and the young man's thoughts turned to his scratcher, no fuckin way was I gonna try and sleep with this nightcrawler fleeing about. Taking decisive action, I opened the blind and opened the window wide as it would go, hoping Batfink would use his super sonic sonart radar to detect the opening. Fat chance. Turns out my bat has about as much sense of direction as a lemon. So he again alights on top of the blind. Daft cunt. Boldened by my encounter, I approached and held the box right in front of the critter, ready to scoop. Pulled the blind cord and the bat went into the box. Quick flick of the wrist and I papped him oot the windae. Good fun, but good riddance. Movie to follow when I can be bothered.
To explain, the flat is on the top dancer, and there must be a wee hole from the roof through to the cupboard, my little bloodsucker must've wormed his way down.
Next night I found some mangy lion and freezing cold witch in there. Feckin' chancers, same treatment, straight oot the windae. That'll learn 'em.